Sometimes you've got to fold before you're found out.

In case anyone was wondering, I quit doing the football picks for the following reasons:
1. I wasn't competing with anyone, thus motivation to actually think beyond which team I liked better before I made the choice was absent.
2. Due to reason number one, I was bad at it.
3. It's my blog, and I don't want to suck.

That's all.

just because everything's changing doesn't mean it's never been this way before.

I just read this paragraph that I wrote about myself two years ago:
"If you know anything about me, you know that I am fond of the spoken word. Now, I'm fond of all words, I love reading and writing... but talking is something that I enjoy doing. I'm a quality time/words of affirmation person..."

At least some things stay the same.

I never tried to make the best of my time when I thought that I had plenty of it.

The thing I appreciate most about Donald Miller's writing is the way he makes you feel like you are his friend. You read what he has to say as if the two of you are sitting at Starbucks with a pumpkin spice latte just having a conversation about life. I'm in the middle of his newest book right now and it's really speaking to me.

The premise is that he is working on writing a screenplay based on his memoir Blue Like Jazz. The writers he is working with are coaching him in what makes a good story, and how he needs to edit the events of his life to create one. All of this leads Don to start critically thinking about living a better story. He talks about life in literary terms, using words like "protagonist," "inciting incidents," and "positive turns."

The book is doing its job in that it is making me think about the kind of story I'm living. One thing I'm afraid of is living a boring story - and I kind of feel like I'm there right now. I don't have a clear cut ambition. I'm not overcoming anything major. I'm too comfortable. I'm in pretty desperate need of an inciting incident, but I'm too nervous to ask for one. In the literary sense, an inciting incident is one that forces the protagonist into a change that they would not have otherwise made. It moves the character from comfortable to uncomfortable, from complacency to conflict. The character doesn't get to choose their inciting incident either. It could be something downright terrible. I don't want anything terrible to happen, but I do need to start living a more exciting story.

This leads me to think of ways I can sort of create my own inciting incident. I guess last July I did so by enrolling in grad school, but even that has fallen into a comfortable rhythm that I can control. I need a goal to work toward, one that is not easy to back out of once I start. I'll have to do some brainstorming. In the meantime, I'm looking forward to finish hanging out with Don Miller via his book.

Hate is a strong word, but I really really really don't like you

This is upsetting. Are you ready for this? I mean, it's a doozy, so be sure you're sitting down. You're sitting? Ok. Here goes.

I'm having a hard time truly hating the Denver Broncos as much as I have in the past.

I know, I know - settle down. Just breathe. It's not as bad as it sounds, I promise. Just let me explain.

The things I hated the most about the Broncos are as follows: Mike Shanahan, Jay Cutler, and their whiny entitlement attitude. Shanahan's gone, Cutler's with the Bears (who I now kinda hate) and this new coach of theirs, Josh McDaniels, seems to have instilled a sense of humility (WHAT?) in the players. The past couple weeks, as reporters have been asking them about their undefeated start and whether they feel they've been perceived ufairly by the public, they all just tote the party line "we're doing what we need to do. We're right where we need to be. We just show up prepared and play the game." What? Who IS this team and what have they done with the Denver Broncos who I am much more comfortable despising? I wanted them to lose to the Patriots today, I guess. Still, part of me is kind of glad that they knocked that classless team of cheaters off their high horse.

Don't worry, I don't LIKE the Broncos - not even a little bit. I'm simply saying that my passionate and fiery hate for the team has abated into an annoyed disliking for now. Broncos fans still really bother me, so I don't see myself ever rooting for them. Also, Champ Bailey is still there and I REALLY don't like him. He's very cocky. Maybe the hate will return after they play the Chiefs. That's usually a good reminder.

I am odds and ends but that's me.

I wonder if some people know that instead of responding to undesirable comments on their facebook and creating a scene, there’s a little x in the right hand corner that actually allows them to just delete the comment and retain their dignity.

I was really excited about a cool late summer and early beginning to fall, but why the face am I thinking I might have to turn my heat on in October?

I’m going to start measuring my life quality by the number of times I can wear leg warmers in a socially acceptable fashion. October is looking good.

It seems to me that whenever I read about a debate of the origins of disposition/etc in my psychology classes (nature vs. nurture? Person vs. situation?) it always ends up that they say “it’s a mix of both!” It’s not that I don’t agree, I just wonder why we spent so much time arguing about it then.

I know it’s being said all over the place, but really, HOW ADORABLE are Jim and Pam? I’d like a Jim, please. Ready for this? Dream Guy: 3 parts Jim Halpert, 3 parts Demetri Martin, 2 parts Jesse Lacey and 1.5 parts Mr. Darcy.

It’s midterm and Fall Break time at Avila. This means that starting next week I’m pretty sure that the entirety of my life will consist of working, homework, class, homework, homework, and homework. I’ll see if I can squeeze some time in to eat and sleep and use the restroom, but nothing is a guarantee.

Older all the time, younger in my mind

So I LOVE birthdays. I love your birthday. I love his birthday. I love her birthday. I love my birthday. I'm all up for celebrating EVERYONE on their special day (and sometimes making that last at least 2 weeks.)

A lot of people don't like it that facebook has birthday reminders because it makes the congratulatory comments from friends who never speak to you otherwise seem generic and trite. I, however, do not see it that way. I don't care if all that happened was that someone glanced over, saw my name on the "today's birthdays" sections, clicked it, wrote "happy birthday" and then moved on never to think of it again. I LOVE that for that 1/2 second, that person thought about how it was my birthday and wanted to wish me well. It's always interesting to me which friends from the past will reappear on my facebook wall on my birthday.

Take that and add phone calls, texts, and emails, and lunch dates. I derive my energy from social interaction and positive relationships. So, needless to say, all of this birthday attention winds me up big time.

That's the long way to basically say that I'm really, really lucky to have such wonderful people in my life, however distant they may be.